Last Updated on July 29, 2021 by Yuvika Iyer
Want to show off your gorgeous houseplants to the world?
We all love our cactuses and succulents, don’t we! They are super-easy to care for, hard to kill, and demand minimal space in your home.
Show off these little bundles of joy on Instagram with the most eye-catching and unique cactus puns, cactus love quotes, funny cactus quotes, cactus sayings, and more!
Plant them in cute and decorative pots to brighten up your working or living space. If you were into artificial plants until now due to no care requirement, I am sure you would love the cute cacti for the same reason.
Just grab a quote from this huge list of witty cactus puns and quotes with the word cactus. Post the images of your gorgeous cacti with witty and soulful captions. Check out some of the beautiful quotes and I am sure you would love to tag them on your cacti image.
72 Witty Cactus Quotes for Instagram
- “He’d always had a quickening of the heart when he crossed into Arizona and beheld the cactus country. This was as the desert should be, this was the desert of the picture books, with the land unrolled to the farthest distant horizon hills, with saguaro standing sentinel in their strange chessboard pattern, towering supinely above the fans of ocotillo and brushy mesquite.” ― Dorothy B. Hughes, The Expendable Man
- “How’d you manage to get tangled up with a cactus?” J.T. crouched beside her and started extricating her from the prickly plant.
- “What a surprise. That boy doesn’t have the sense God gave a cactus.” ― Kathleen Peacock, Hemlock
- “During your struggle society is not a bunch of flowers, it is a bunch of cactus.” ― Amit Kalantri, Wealth of Words
- “It was the act of a gentleman, and Damian was as gentle as a cactus.” ― Aishabella Sheikh, Converting The Bad Boy
- “Anger was simple, self-sustaining as a cactus. You couldn’t look too closely at it, lest the spines get you in the eye.” ― Rebecca Scherm, Unbecoming
- “Be sharp like a cactus, people are afraid to touch and not a sort of rubbish.” ― Sophieya
- “Every cactus blooms, some with little rooms, some give flowers that grow, others so small it won’t show! ― Ana Claudia Antunes, Pierrot & Columbine
- Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don’t have to sit on it. — Joyce Meyer
- Be a cactus in a world full of delicate flowers. A cactus is just an aggressive cucumber. I’m ready to stop being cactI and ready to start being cactUS.
- If you were a cactus, I’d endure all the pain just to hug you!
- Gardening requires lots of water – most of it in the form of perspiration. ~ Lou Erickson
- Go and climb a cactus! So many seeds — so little time. Old Gardeners never die, they just go to seed. Life is like a cactus, prickly but very beautiful. If you get struck by a cactus, consider it a cactus kiss. Because we all know Love hurts. ~ Jessica Anna Jones
- You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy succulents! And that is pretty much the same thing.
- Reach for the stars, even if you have to stand on a cactus.
- Loving someone who doesn’t love you back is like hugging a cactus. The tighter you hold on, the more it’s going to hurt.
- The world is full of cactus, but we don’t have to sit on it
- ~ Will Foley
- Take the rose—most people think it very beautiful: I don’t care for It at all. I prefer the cactus, for the simple reason that it has a more interesting personality. It has wonderfully adapted itself to its surroundings! It is the best illustration of the theory of evolution in plant life. — Charles Proteus Steinmetz
- “People trample over flowers, yet only to embrace a cactus”. James Joyce
- “Don’t jack off a cactus, and you’ll only hurt your hand and the cactus’ feelings” ~ Tre Cool
- “Reach for the stars, even if you have to stand on a cactus.” ~ Unknown
- “She was elusive. She was today. She was tomorrow. She was the faintest scent of a cactus flower, the flitting shadow of an elf owl. We did not know what to make of her. In our minds, we tried to pin her to a corkboard like a butterfly, but the pin merely went through, and away she flew.” ~ Jerry Spinelli
- “Loving someone who doesn’t love you back is like hugging a cactus. The tighter you hold on, the more it’s going to hurt.” ~ Unknown
- “Focusing on the negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult” ~ TobyMac
- “I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.” ~ Demetri Martin
- “I’m an observer of life. I like to watch people, and I like to watch cactus. I like to talk to mountains and communicate with my friends in the other spheres and dimensions.” ~ Frederick Lenz
- “The Big Cactus… because if you come too close, you’re gonna get stuck.” ~ Shaquille O’Neal
- “Who wants to become a writer? And why? Because it’s the answer to everything. … It’s the streaming reason for living. To note, to pin down, to build up, to create, to be astonished at nothing, to cherish the oddities, to let nothing go down the drain, to make something, to make a great flower out of life, even if it’s a cactus.” ~ Enid Bagnold
- “I’m like the trunk of a cactus… I take in a dose of culture and time with friends, then I retreat and go live on it for a while until I get thirsty again.” ~ Nancy Horan
- “A whale is as unique as a cactus. But don’t ask a whale to survive Death Valley. We all have special gifts. Where we use them and how determines whether we actually complete something.” ~ Max De Pree
- “What is the difference between a cactus and a conservative caucus? On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside.” ~ John Diefenbaker
- “I remember very clearly someone saying, ‘Don’t shake hands with the cactus,’ and I thought, ‘Well, why not? What could possibly go wrong?’ Shaking hands is a friendly gesture.” ~ Benedict Cumberbatch
- “The secret of improved plant breeding, apart from scientific knowledge, is love. While I was conducting experiments to make spineless cacti, I often talked to the plants. . . . “You have nothing to fear,” I would tell them. “You don’t need your defensive thorns. I will protect you.” Gradually the useful plant of the desert emerged in a thornless variety.” ~ Luther Burbank
- “A creative person has to create. It doesn’t really matter what you create. If such a dancer wanted to go out and build the cactus gardens where he could, in Mexico, let him do that, but something that is creative has to go on.” ~ Katherine Dunham
- “Thanks a heap, coyote ugly. This cactus-gram stings worse than your abandonment.” ~ Diablo Cody
- “I’m erased. I’m gone. I’m nothing. And then the world is free to flow into me like water into an empty bowl…. And… I see. I hear. But not with eyes and ears. I’m not outside my world anymore, and I’m not really inside it either. The thing is, there’s no difference between me and the universe. The boundary is gone. I am it and it is me. I am a stone, a cactus thorn. I am rain. I like that most of all, being rain.” ~ Jerry Spinelli
- “I want my body to help fertilize the growth of a cactus or cliff rose or sagebrush or tree.” ~ Edward Abbey
- “In the first place you can’t see anything from a car; you’ve got to get out of the goddamned contraption and walk, better yet crawl, on hands and knees, over the sandstone and through the thornbush and cactus. When traces of blood begin to mark your trail you’ll begin to see something, maybe. Probably not.” ~ Edward Abbey
- “Rearing three children is like growing a cactus, a gardenia, and a tubful of impatiens. Each needs varying amounts of water, sunlight and pruning. Were I to be absolutely fair, I would have to treat each child as if he or she were absolutely identical to the other siblings, and there would be no profit for anyone in that.” ~ Phyllis Grissim-Theroux
- “My dad is like a cactus – introverted and tough. I’m a people person, like my mom, but I got my competitiveness from my dad. He came to this country from Belarus with nothing and built a real business. He’s my hero for giving me that need to run a business and for having enormous confidence in me.” ~ Gary Vaynerchuk
- “Mexican cars are just going to be lazy, feckless, flatulent, overweight, leaning against a fence asleep looking at a cactus with a blanket with a hole in the middle on as a coat.” ~ Richard Hammond
- “You told us to leave you in the desert, because you planned to start a new life as cactus,” Catarina said, her voice flat. “Then you conjured up tiny needles and threw them at us. With pinpoint accuracy.” ~ Cassandra Clare
- “What are the plants doing? What are plants all about? They serve human beings by being decorative, but what is it from its own point of view? It’s using up air; it’s using up energy. It’s really not doing anything except being ornamental. And yet here’s this whole vegetable world, cactus plants, trees, roses, tulips, and edible vegetables, like cabbages, celery, lettuce – they’re all doing this dance.” ~ Alan Watts
- “Many of the Huichols and North American protests claim that when one eats peyote, one is “tasting oneself: if the user is pure, this cactus is “sweet.” Barbara Myerhoff, accompanying the Huichols during their 1965 and 1966 hunts, recorded that they urge new participants to “Chew it well. It is sweet, like tortillas.” ~ Peter Stafford
- “It is only the story…that saves our progeny from blundering like blind beggars into the spikes of the cactus fence. The story is our escort; without it,we are blind. Does the blind man own his escort?No, neither do we the story; rather,it is the story that owns us.” ~ Chinua Achebe
- “I had forgotten that talking to you is like trying to pet a cactus.” Saiman said dryly. “Thank you for reminding me.” “Always happy to oblige.” ~ Ilona Andrews
- “In the Middle Ages, people took potions for their ailments. In the 19th century, they took snake oil. Citizens of today’s shiny, technological age are too modern for that. They take antioxidants and extract of cactus instead.” ~ Charles Krauthammer
- “I’m always very interested in breeding. Raising cacti is breeding. My lotus plant collection is breeding. The insects are breeding.” ~ Takashi Murakami
- “Anyone can win a slam-dunk contest. The real Superman is dead. He was assassinated by Pat Riley. I’m the Big Cactus now and ready to roll again.” ~ Shaquille O’Neal
- “I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it’s a cactus.” ~ Unknown
- “There was a product on late night TV that you could attach to your garden hose – “You can water your hard-to-reach plants with this.” Who would make their plants hard to reach? That seems so very mean. I know you need water, but I’m going to make you hard to reach. “Think like a cactus!”” ~ Mitch Hedberg
- “Adolescence is like cactus.” ~ Anais Nin
- “Hope is not a resting place but a starting point – a cactus, not a cushion” ~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
- I have learned the difference between a cactus and a caucus. On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside. Mo Udall
- A cactus doesn’t live in the desert because it likes the desert; it lives there because the desert hasn’t killed it yet. Hope Jahren
- In Mexico, when we want to speak deep secrets, we drink pulque together. It is a drink made from the cactus plant, and when you take the bottle from your mouth, it leaves a string behind, between the mouth and the bottle, like a spider’s web. It shows that the truth sticks inside. Alejandro Jodorowsky
- Too much detail can bog down any story. Enough with the history of gunpowder, the geology of Hawaii, the processes of whaling, and cactus and tumbleweed. Edward M. Lerner
- A creative person has to create. It doesn’t really matter what you create. If such a dancer wanted to go out and build the cactus gardens where he could, in Mexico, let him do that, but something that is creative has to go on. Katherine Dunham
- “Pretty fly for a cacti.”
- “Be a cactus in a world of delicate flowers.”
- “Bloom where you are planted.”
- “A cactus is just a really aggressive cucumber.”
- “I’m totally stuck on you.”
- “Hey, you’re lookin’ really sharp.”
- “You’re as cute as my new cactus.”
- “All good things are wild and free.” — Henry David Thoreau
- “Dear, cactus. I promise I’ll never desert you.”
- “Be your own kind of beautiful.”
- “Best friends always stick together.”
- “To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow.” — Audrey Hepburn
Show off Your Beautiful Plants on Instagram with Cute Cactus Quotes and Captions
If you want to add instant colors to your home decor, cacti are the plants to consider. Rush to your neighborhood garden store, pick up all the prickly beauties you can, and spruce up your living space.
Your living room shelves or kitchen windowsill may not have enough room to fit in all these lovely plants. You may have to pick another room to fit the rest but is there any harm in it?
Just think, every corner of your rooms will have beautiful splashes of color and be Instagram worthy. Show off your amazing cacti collections on Instagram with your favorite cactus captions and quotes.